Just to be on some real gay shit….

Being gay I have become very shallow and that is what the gay world is all about. When I first got started heavily into talking to men I was not physically attractive. The standard was 6’0 and 150 lsb. I was not into fashion, not very trendy I was just me. About 2 years ago I lost 50 pound. Drop from 220 to 165 pounds. I got a few hits but I was not there. I did not have no muscle, my muscle was not properly defined. No six pack equals no sex appeals. What kept these dudes coming was my fat ass... sadly to say. I post a picture of my ass, hoping I would get someone that is nice to talk to, hoping me and that person would eventually go somewhere. But a picture of my ass doesn’t really tell much. Before it was of my face…nothing….my chest….nothing as in no hit….my dick….nothing…..my ass in a few min 10.

But you know what I am a funny dude. To be honest I don’t even know why the fuck am I stressing myself and getting my heart beat as if I found something that I like. You know when your heart is pounding like a drum, as if something you been waiting for, for so long appeared. I fucking hate that shit. This dude hit me up. 6’0 tall, sexy, cute in his own way, single but dating this slim as dude who is full of drama, who is involve, married, have HIV positive. WTF. I once remember this one dude, same shit, but the thing is the dude he was talking to was all about games. Skinny bitch are fucking evil. Because not only do they ruin shit for the rest of the not so average gay guy but they lead those who are potential off a cliff. They use, abuse, and then spit out the rest. Then they have issues and want to be alone.

In this lifestyle if your not skinny, like 120, you will never found anybody. If you don’t have a six pack, you might be alone for the rest of your life. If you not your height or your proper weight, game over, you did not make the cut. Average don’t make the cut, thick, fat, and forget about it. Sometimes deep inside me, where I am the only who can listen wish I was skinny or wish I was not attracted to guy or wish I was not in this game. Some part of me hates them all for being this way, hate myself, hate God hate everything